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There comes a moment in your career when you feel it in your gut it is time to go. I've been there, actually more than once. I still remember the day I turned in my resignation. I was exhausted, frustrated and honestly done. But before I could even walk out the door, before the ink dried on the resignation letter, my company offered me more money to stay. And guess what? I said yes, and it was the worst decision I could have made. Because here's what I realized later. Because here's what I realized later If I was worth that money the day I resigned, I was worth it long before I had to threaten to leave. That raise didn't fix the real problem, it didn't get to the root of anything and it didn't erase the resentment that I felt for being overlooked in the first place.

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In today's Leadership Unfiltered episode, I want to talk about the signs it may be time to leave, why staying for money rarely solves the real problem, and how to leave with clarity and confidence. And I'm also going to share how to give your organization the chance to meet your needs before you walk away. So let me back up a little bit. The reason I turned in my resignation wasn't just about pay, and I need to clarify that. It was about feeling and being undervalued and overlooked. I had been showing up, putting in the work, delivering excellent results. It showed up on my reviews and in other ways, and yet I kept getting passed over for opportunities. And yet I kept getting passed over for opportunities. When I gave my notice, they suddenly saw my value. Look at that and offered me more money to stay and for a moment I felt validated. It actually felt like validation. I thought man, they finally see me.

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But in the coming weeks and months, the same frustrations return. The culture didn't change, the lack of growth didn't change and, honestly, my feelings toward the organization didn't change. I actually became more frustrated. Change I actually became more frustrated. That's when I learned this truth that money doesn't fix misalignment. It only delays the inevitable because I ended up leaving anyway.

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If you're listening to this and wondering if it's time to go, I want to share with you today. I'm going to share with you some red flags I wish I had paid more attention to sooner, one of the ones that I was able to see, which is why I ended up leaving. I was constantly being overlooked for promotions and growth opportunities. If that is you, this is a clear red sign. I had exceptional reviews. I made sure that the person that I was reporting to, and even human resources, knew that I was looking to grow with the organization, because I wanted everybody to know. I also had awesome team success. I had been able to turn around low performing departments more than once and still I was overlooked for promotions and growth opportunities.

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The other thing is is that you don't see a clear path forward for your career. If you are looking to grow, if that is your ultimate goal, you need to be able to see a clear path forward for your career with the organization that you're working with, and if you don't see that, that's another red flag. This is a big one. The culture or leadership is draining your energy or misaligned with your values. This is why I talk a lot about knowing your principles and understanding your values, so that you could clearly see when there is a misalignment. And the last thing is is that you are burnt out, disengaged or feeling invisible. No matter how hard you work, you feel unseen and again, you're burnt out and disengaged. You just you're not feeling it. So if you're nodding your head to any of this, it's a sign to pause. I'm not saying leave. It's a sign to pause and take an honest look at your situation.

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However, there's a caveat. If you still enjoy the work or you believe in the organization that you work for, before you leave, make sure that you are vocal about what you need in order to stay. Maybe it's a title change, a pay adjustment, more growth opportunities or simply recognition for what you bring to the table. Give your leaders the chance to meet your needs first. The first thing you do shouldn't be to resign. If you are like I said, you enjoy the work and you believe in the organization, then give them the opportunity. That way, if they don't step up, you leave with clarity and no regrets. You'll know you advocated for yourself before making a big decision, because it is a big decision to leave an organization, especially if you've been there for a while, especially if you are in a leadership position and you have a team. It doesn't just impact you and the people around you, it directly impacts your team. And I know I already know, because I used to think this way as well that some of you are thinking well, they should just know. My work should speak for itself and let's be real, it doesn't always work that way and closed mouths don't get fed.

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If you want an opportunity, a promotion, support, whatever it is, you need to speak up and ask for it. If you never speak up, your leaders might assume that you're content with where you are. Everybody does not want to grow. Everybody does not want to reach the next level. So, before you walk away from an organization that you actually like, give them a chance to meet your needs. Advocate for yourself, because silence won't get you the career that you want or the career that you deserve. I've done it myself, which is why I started by saying earlier that they knew I wanted to raise. They knew I wanted to grow with the organization. They knew all of these things. I was vocal about it and you want to be vocal about it as well. It's that important.

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Now let's talk about the money trap that I fell into, that raise or counteroffer. It feels good in the moment, but the reality of it is it's short-term relief or a long-term problem. There were other problems that I had with the organization and money doesn't erase missed opportunities or a toxic culture. That doesn't change because you make more money and in many ways specifically in my case, accepting a raise to stay it just delays the departure. Like I said, I ended up leaving anyway because it wasn't only about money, but I don't have a regrets and because of the God I serve, I understand that nothing is wasted. I learned a lesson that I'm able to share right now, today, and if it can help one person by sharing my story, if I can help one person, then I've already won. It's worth it. And I know that there are people listening to this podcast right now, because I know I'm not the only one. Remember, I coach leaders, so I know that I'm not the only one that have experienced this or are experiencing this. I know that there's people out there that's listening to it, and you may be one of them, and this is going to help you with the decision that you need to make. So the money trap we're not falling for it.

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The other trap that I fell into, and maybe some of you have too, is the recognition trap. That's what I'm going to call it. I was showered with bonuses, so I was at the manager level. I got bonuses, I got awards and public praise and all type of recognition. I have some stuff around here somewhere. That's how valuable it was to me. I have some stuff around here somewhere that I was given you know whether it be plaques and you know all other kinds of stuff but I never got the seat at the table that reflected my value or allowed me to have the influence I desired. And this is where the trap comes in those recognitions and all of that stuff. That is the trap. I was good enough to execute the decisions but not trusted enough to influence them. Let me say that again I was good enough to execute the decisions but not trusted enough to influence the decisions.

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And at first, the recognition and all of that, it felt good. Who doesn't like recognition or bonuses and things like that? But the truth is, applause without advancement is just a temporary distraction and that's exactly what that was. It was a distraction for what it really was, that I wanted and that I deserve. So organizations they can give you all the feel good moments they want. So recognitions and plaques and bonuses and all of that stuff is good.

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I'm not saying that it's not good. I share with my leaders that I work with that you want to give your team recognition, you want to make sure you acknowledge them, but if they're not offering real growth and influence or path forward. It keeps you stuck in the same place. You're not offering real growth and influence or a path forward. It keeps you stuck in the same place. You're not going anywhere and, over time, the gap between how hard you work and how far you can go only grows. You become more frustrated. So I want you to be really careful with this trap and really understand that a lot of times, this is so that you don't reach the level of influence where you're actually influencing decisions not just executing the decisions that have been made, but influencing the decisions. If this is something that you want to do, everybody does not want to grow. I've worked with managers that they like and enjoy being a manager and they're good where they are. If your goal is to grow, then this is a part of it, right being able to influence the decisions.

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So I want to wrap this up because I've talked about a couple of different things. If you have done your reflection and you've sat in it because I really want you to do it and you have come to the conclusion that this is not the organization for you and it should be about more than money, this could be about the environment, the culture, the being overlooked, because in my case, it wasn't that there weren't any open positions. The positions became available time and time again. I'm talking about the person that I report to. They filled that position several times While I was in my role.

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If you've come to the conclusion that it's time for you to move on, there's a couple of things that I want to leave you with. So, if you've reached the point it's time to move on, I want to talk to you about some best practices for leaving the right way. This is extremely important because for me, anytime I've left an organization, the crazy thing about it is I go to another organization and someone that I work with in my past is there. Or they're a vendor or in some way, our paths have crossed. Also, I've had where I left an organization and someone that worked at that organization called me for a job. So I didn't have to do a lot of interviewing because they knew me. They knew how I work, they knew what I brought to the table, they recognized the value, they were in another organization and they wanted me there and they called me. This is why we want to do things the right way when we leave.

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So the first thing I want you to do is reflect, know your why and be clear on your next move. Know exactly what it is that you're looking for, why you want to leave the organization, what you want in your career, so that you are clear on what your next move is. And again, if this is an organization that you feel that you like and you could continue to work there, advocate for yourself before you exit. Ask for what you want. Don't leave wondering what if I had asked? Ask them people, see what they say.

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The third thing is before you leave, prepare financially and logistically. I share on a previous episode that I'll link below, where I did not do that. Thankfully, things ended up working out for me, but I allowed myself to get to a place where I was so overwhelmed and burned out and frustrated that I just went to my desk and turned in my resignation, typed it up on their time on their computer and turned in my resignation because I did not prepare the way I could have or should have. So I want you to prepare financially. Make sure you have a plan in place or a cushion. The fourth thing is and you should be doing this on a regular basis document your wins. Document your wins. Many times we don't do a good job at this, and I work with a lot of women and we are some of the worst people at doing this. We get a win and we pat ourselves on the back and it's like yay, and maybe have a glass of wine, and then you're on to the next thing. But those days are over. I want you to go out, get you a journal a separate journal that's specifically for this where you are going to document your wins and your successes, and then you're going to update your resume and LinkedIn with your accomplishments.

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The 15th exit with grace. Give proper notice, transition your work and keep the doors open. Like I said, you never know when you're going to meet somebody in another organization, in another place. Even let me just say this, even owning my own business, let me just say this, even owning my own business, it has benefited me to leave gracefully, because I'm interacting with some of those people. Some of those people have referred me to get jobs. That's number five. Number six prioritize your peace. Leaving is as much about reclaiming your energy and confidence as it is about career advancement. Prioritize your peace. This is a big step and this is why I want you to make sure that, if this is something that you are trying to do, that you put a lot of thought behind it and also that you are intentional with how you move through this season of your career season of your career.

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Here's what I would like you to walk away with today.

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If an organization only values you when you're leaving, that's a sign it's already too late.

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Speak up, advocate for yourself and, if nothing changes, give yourself permission to go where you are truly valued. If today's episode hit home for you, if you've ever felt undervalued, overlooked or stuck in a role where you're good enough to execute but never invited to influence, don't stay in that space alone. This is exactly why I created the Leadership Shift Coaching. It's a space for leaders like you to get the tools, support and strategies you need to confidently advocate for yourself and build the career and team you actually want and deserve. If you want to learn more about the Leadership Shift, you can go to Signal Partners Signal with a C C-I-G-N-A-L partnerscom, slash the shift and you can learn more information. And if you want bite-sized weekly tips to strategies to help you navigate leadership challenges, make sure you're signed up for the Team Navigator newsletter, which is going to be linked below in the show notes, you'll be able to find also the link to the Leadership Shift as well. Until next time, protect your peace, trust your gut and lead with confidence.